Nathalie Ricaud, a professional organiser and founder of Get Organised & Beyond, is a mum, too! Here, she shares tips on teaching organisation skills to children.
Tip #1 Don't organise for your child
Organising is about establishing processes and systems that are going to work for the individual based on her needs, habits and preferences.
Imposing your ways onto others, including your children, is unlikely to work in the long term because they might not suit them or they might just resist them.
Do this instead: Involve your child in the organising process and help her build a system that takes his/her preferences into consideration.
For instance, a mother moved the laundry basket from the bathroom to her 10-year-old boy's bedroom,. This way, it is easier for him to put his dirty clothes in the laundry as he gets undressed.
Tip #2: Don't jump to your child's rescue as soon as he fails
Nathalie confesses that it’s difficult for her to see a bag of dirty soccer clothes left unattended. However, she has to resist the urge to pick it up as her son will very quickly delegate this responsibility to her.
“It’s the same with being mindful of the time in the morning for the school bus pick-up. If I keep reminding him of the time, he will just rely on me even if he doesn’t like to be reminded,” she says.
Do this instead: Give them a chance to learn from their mistakes by bearing the consequences of their actions/decisions. Make sure the rest of your household, including your domestic helper, acts accordingly.
As renowned advice columnist Ann Landers put it: “It is not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves, that will make them successful human beings.”
Tip #3: Start small, and don't expect perfection
If you expect perfection from your child, it might stop her all together if she believes she cannot live up to your expectations. It’s also unrealistic to expect your child to change overnight. As in many other areas, it does take practice to find a system that’s going to work for her and it takes about 4 weeks for a new habit to kick in.
Do this instead: Don’t try to change things all at once, but start small. Focus on the progress they’re making. Reward them appropriately when they’ve achieved a milestone.
It’s certainly not easy to get a child’s cooperation when it comes to getting organised, especially if you don’t take into consideration her own needs and quickly jump to her rescue. So, be patient and celebrate small successes when they happen and build onto them.
Other useful tips:
- Without personal motivation, it’ll be difficult for your child to get going. Look for a point of leverage and let her know the value in getting organised, such as getting to school on time.
- Using threats and bribes may work for a while, but you'll quickly be back at square one.
- Volunteer your help to your child, but make sure to respect her decisions.